Learning in Wartime, 2001
Albert Louis Zambone
January 1, 2003
I.
I sit in one of the dives
On Fifty-second Street
Uncertain and afraid
As the clever hopes expire
Of a low dishonest decade;
Waves of anger and fear
Circulate over the bright
And darkened lands of the earth,
Obsessing our private lives;
The unmentionable odour of death
Offends the September night
—W. H. Auden, September 1, 1939
At 2:00 p.m. here in Oxford, England, on 11 September 2001, I was fighting off sleep at my desk in the Bodleian Library. Eventually I decided to surrender and run some errands in the open air. At least that way, I thought virtuously, I could make some use of the day.
On High Street, beneath the shadow of the University Church of St. Mary, I bumped into one of the 70 American exchange students for who I am responsible. "Hey, Al," she said, "did you hear? Some plane ran into the World Trade Center."
How to say what passes through your mind? Surely she must be mistaken, she's just a cheerful kid, what does she know. Dear God, no, not at long last, not what I've always feared. Oh, I remember planes just missing the Trade Center before, back in the early '80s; probably just a sensationalistic British news report, they're simply shameless over here.
"Oh, it's probably some mistake," I said. "Let's go have a cup of tea."
Tea was duly had. No thoughts were given to the World Trade Center. Afterwards I think I had almost forgotten what Annie had said to me on High Street. I walked back towards our building, and there, in front of the TV store, was a crowd. I knew in an instant it was all true, and even worse. Two square cigarettes, smoldering vertically in the most beautiful skyline in the world.
Back to the hall in central Oxford where I live and work, walking quickly now. I go in, up the steps, into the office. Two ...
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