A Warm Body and a Badge
Jennifer Bayne
January 1, 2002
Have you ever had a moment where the universe called out to you? I was standing at the back of the elevator, looking at my map of the hospital. A blond girl, about five years old, pushed the elevator button repeatedly. She was wearing her hospital clothes, a pink pajama set decorated with multi-colored balloons. Her older brother looked down at her. "Do you know where the playground is?" he asked her. "Of course," she said, hopping from one foot to the other. The elevator door opened and the children ran out.
Children running off to a playground should have been a happy sight. But somewhere in the back of mind I heard Rachel weeping for her children (Jer. 31:15). Who would have thought an elevator ride could illustrate so clearly the fallenness of the universe? The young girl knew the hospital better than I did because it was her second home. Never before had the universe called out to me in such agony. Something in that moment demanded that I become a minister.
Unfortunately, the universe did not speak to me so dramatically after that. As the orientation for my clinical pastoral education unit (CPE)-required by my presbytery as part of my ordination training-continued, I waited with anticipation and dread for the moment we would be set loose on the floors. First, though, I expected they would turn me into a real minister; surely they would not turn loose a 22-year-old introvert who lacked the magic ministerial ability to exude God from every pore of her body. But the orientation only taught us the many administrative procedures we would need to follow, from documenting our visits in the patient charts to filling out paperwork in the event of a death. I was confused and a little frustrated. I wanted to know how to be a minister, ...
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